Wedding Protocol/Information...

Congratulations on your engagement! Whether you celebrate your wedding day here at St. Francis Xavier or elsewhere you have our prayers and best wishes. For your convenience the following is a list of policies for all weddings that are celebrated at St. Francis Xavier Church in Petoskey, Michigan.

Who May Celebrate Their Wedding at St. Francis Xavier?
The interest in SFX Church as a site for a wedding is very high.  It is not possible to fulfill all of the requests that come to us. As a result we have had to establish criteria.  There must be some reasonable connection with SFX Parish.  That is, you would have to be a full-time or a part-time parishioner, or have roots here. You must be a practicing Catholic.  If you are a member of a Catholic Church other than SFX you will need to present us with a letter from your pastor stating that you are a member in good standing in your parish.

Though full-time and part-time members of SFX Parish have priority, we do make exceptions for those who do not have any connection with the parish. This would hinge on whether they practice their Catholic faith and are registered members of their parish back home. Such couples would normally have to provide their own priest for the wedding ceremony. Permanent Deacons do not have faculties to witness weddings Within the Diocese of Gaylord.

Setting the Date and Time.

It is wise to set a wedding date one year in advance.  This date should be set prior to arranging for a reception site. Wedding times are set at 12:00 p.m. and 3:00 p.m.  No weddings will be permitted on Sundays or on Friday evenings when weddings are scheduled for that Saturday.

Choosing a Presider...

The parish pastor or associate pastor will preside at all weddings of full or part-time parishioners. Normally, other couples would provide their own priest.  The guest priest must be able to produce proof that he is a priest in good standing within his own diocese.  A word of caution: It is not easy getting a priest to witness a marriage in some other town.  Priests are busy on weekends with their own responsibilities. You must be certain that your priest will be available.

Marriage Preparation Requirements...

Marriage preparation at St. Francis Xavier begins in January.  All couples are obligated to participate in marriage prep.  Those who live in another town will be expected to take their marriage prep in their own parish.  This would include all paper work and any needed dispensations.  Notify SFX Parish via a formal letter where your marriage prep will be taking place.  That is, the name of the church, address, phone number and the name of the priest.  When your marriage prep is completed your priest will send us a letter stating that you have fulfilled the obligations of the parish and diocese.  All couples must be ready to produce baptismal records.

Liturgy Planning...

Early in your marriage preparation, you will receive some material that will help you plan the details of your wedding liturgy.  If both parties are Catholic, a wedding is normally celebrated within Mass.  This, however, is not required.  If one party is not Catholic, a wedding is celebrated outside of Mass.  All details of your wedding liturgy are subject to approval of the pastor.  Please note the following...

   –You should choose a lector (or two).  Your lector must be a practicing Catholic if you have a Mass. 
     If you are celebrating your wedding outside of Mass, your lector must be at least a practicing
     Christian.  Choose someone who has the ability to do public reading as well.
  –If you are celebrating your Wedding within Mass, you should choose two Eucharistic Ministers.
  –Your Lector would normally read the General Intercessions.
  –Depending on the size of your wedding, you should have at least two Ushers.  The Groomsmen can
      fulfill this role or at least help the Ushers. 
  –If you have flower girls, or ring bearers, they should be at least 5 years of age or mature enough to
      fulfill their role.  Please, no aisle runners and no throwing of flower petals on the floor.
  –The Unity Candle is not part of the Catholic Ritual of Marriage.
  –For maintenance reasons, do not throw rice, birdseed, or anything else in or outside the church.
  –Flowers to Mary are optional.
  –Mass Servers are optional.
  –Flowers are optional.  Please keep it simple.  The church is already very ornate.  You may take the
      flowers with you after the wedding or leave them for the parish to enjoy.
  –Dress modestly and appropriately for a church wedding.

The Wedding Stipend...

Full-time and part-time parishioners are asked to pay a stole fee of $150. In addition, they must pay the organist's fee and the cantor's fee.  Non-parishioners will be expected to pay a stole fee of $1,000, plus the organist and cantor fees. The fees are due in advance made  payable to the parish, the organist and to the cantor.

There is not an obligation to pay the priest who witnesses your wedding.  If you wish to give him a personal gift it is your perogative and always appreciated.

Music...

The parish Director of Music is here to serve you.  It is your responsiblity to make an appointment with her, and you should arrange early on to meet with her.  Only liturgical music is appropriate for a church wedding, and the music director has the final say on your musical selections. As Music Director, one of her roles is to play organ and/or piano for weddings at St. Francis.  If you wish to have other musical instruments played by guest musicians, you may do so, with the Music Director's approval.  Cantors and soloists are available through the parish.  You also may wish to ask a qualified soloist to sing; a tape, recording, or CD of the soloist must be provided to the Music Director, and final approval is up to her.

The Rehearsal...

The wedding rehearsal normally takes place in the late afternoon or early evening the day before the wedding.  Keep in mind the ability of your wedding party to be present.  Parents, lectors, ushers, wedding party, bride, and groom should all be present for the wedding rehearsal.

The Photographer...

The photographer should be a professional.  Only one person is allowed to take pictures at a wedding, your photographer.  You may also have someone videotape the ceremony if you wish.  All guests are requested not to use their cameras.

The Timing...

A Wedding Mass lasts for approximately 50 minutes.  The Rite of Marriage outside of Mass lasts approximately 35 minutes.  All wedding people must be out of the church by 4:30pm.  Be sure to appoint someone to do a walk-through of the church upstairs and down to check for any personal articles let behind.